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  • Writer: Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
    Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
  • Nov 8, 2024

Note: This content is fictional and created with the intention to inspire, uplift, and support you on your mental health journey. If it feels discouraging, please feel free to disregard it—your well-being is always the priority.

Beyond the Screen: Matt’s Battle with Gaming Addiction and the Road to Recovery

Matt had always loved video games. As a teenager, they were his escape. Life in high school was tough—anxiety over grades, the pressure to fit in, and an overall sense of not quite measuring up. Gaming provided him with an easy way to step away from the daily stress and immerse himself in a world where success came in the form of levels, points, and virtual victories. It felt good to win, and in the game, Matt was someone important, someone in control.


What started as a way to pass the time gradually took over his life. At first, it was just an hour here and there—late nights with friends in an online match or solo sessions to unwind after school. But soon, those hours began to stretch longer. Gaming was no longer a hobby; it was an obsession. Matt would spend entire weekends lost in games, his world shrinking down to a screen, the outside world fading into the background. He stopped seeing friends, stopped doing homework, and started pulling away from his family. He rationalized it at first—he was just having fun, right? But deep down, he knew something was wrong.


The signs of his addiction were there if he cared to look—sleep deprivation, a growing sense of emptiness, and a mounting pile of missed opportunities in the real world. But Matt wasn’t ready to face it. Gaming was his shield. Whenever life felt overwhelming, the game offered him relief. In-game achievements replaced real-life accomplishments, and the virtual camaraderie with teammates gave him a sense of belonging he didn’t feel in his day-to-day interactions.


It wasn’t until the consequences of his addiction became too loud to ignore that Matt began to face the truth. One evening, after playing for an entire day, Matt received a text from his best friend, Jake. It was short and simple: *"Where are you? We were supposed to hang out today."* Matt had completely forgotten. He hadn’t just missed a hangout—he had missed out on being a friend. The guilt hit him harder than any in-game loss ever had. It wasn’t just a missed opportunity; it was the slow erosion of the relationships that mattered to him most.


The next day, his mother sat him down. She had been patient for a while, but her concern was evident now. “Matt,” she said gently, “this isn’t healthy. You’re not the same person anymore.” Her words stung, but they were also a wake-up call. It was the first time someone had said it aloud. Gaming wasn’t just a hobby anymore; it was controlling him. The realization sunk in slowly, and with it came an overwhelming sense of loss—he had allowed his life to revolve around something that gave him no real joy. The victories in the game didn’t translate to any sense of fulfillment outside of it.


For a long time, Matt had ignored the warning signs. He had thought that gaming was just a phase, something that would naturally burn itself out. But deep down, he knew the truth: his gaming had become a way to avoid the difficulties of his life. The stress of school, his fear of failure, his social anxiety—all of it was easier to escape into the world of fantasy, where he could control outcomes and avoid confrontation with his real-world problems.


That moment, sitting across from his mother, was the first time Matt had truly considered that he might be addicted. It was painful to admit, but he knew he had to confront it. The next step wasn’t easy. Matt reached out for help, and with the support of his family, he began seeing a therapist. The first few sessions were uncomfortable. He wasn’t sure how to articulate the feelings of shame and guilt that weighed him down, but his therapist helped him break it down. Gaming wasn’t just an addiction—it was a coping mechanism for deeper issues. He was using the games to numb out the stress and anxiety that he didn’t know how to handle.


Matt’s recovery wasn’t a straight line. It was messy, filled with setbacks and moments of doubt. At first, he tried cutting back on his gaming by setting limits. But the urge to play, to escape, was still so strong. There were times when he relapsed, when he found himself once again binge-playing for hours, only to feel empty afterward. It took time, but Matt began to realize that change didn’t come in perfect steps. Recovery was about making progress, not achieving perfection.


One of the most difficult parts was learning to sit with the discomfort. Gaming had been a way to avoid feeling anything uncomfortable—whether it was anxiety about school, the fear of failure, or the loneliness he sometimes felt. He had to find new ways to cope with those feelings, ways that didn’t involve escaping into a game. Over time, he started journaling, a practice he’d never tried before. Writing down his thoughts helped him process his emotions in a way that gaming never had. He also started exercising more, something he had neglected during his gaming binge. The physical activity helped clear his mind and gave him a sense of accomplishment outside of the virtual world.


Matt also reconnected with his friends, slowly but surely. It wasn’t always easy—some relationships had faded because of his addiction. But the more effort he put into real-life connections, the more fulfilling they became. He learned how to be present again, how to have conversations without being distracted by the pull of his phone or the temptation to game.


There were small victories along the way—like the time he turned down an all-night gaming session to go to a friend’s birthday party, or when he spent a Saturday hiking instead of grinding for hours on a new game. These moments, though small, reminded him that there was a life beyond the screen, a life that he could still shape.


A turning point in Matt’s journey came when he realized that he didn’t have to give up gaming entirely to regain control of his life. He had always loved games, but they no longer had to be the center of his world. He found a healthier balance. Gaming became something he did in moderation, an occasional pastime rather than a daily necessity. He could enjoy the games he loved without letting them take over his life.


Looking back, Matt sees his addiction not as a shameful chapter, but as a pivotal part of his growth. It taught him invaluable lessons about self-awareness, the importance of balance, and the need to confront his emotions head-on. He learned that true fulfillment doesn’t come from escaping into a virtual world—it comes from facing life as it is, with all its messiness and challenges, and learning how to thrive despite them.


Today, Matt is in a much healthier place. He’s rebuilt his relationships, his mental health is stronger, and he’s rediscovered his passions. Gaming is still a part of his life, but it’s no longer his crutch. It’s just another hobby, one of many pieces of the puzzle that make up his fuller, richer life.


Matt’s story is a reminder that no matter how deep the struggle may seem, recovery is always possible. It takes time, effort, and the willingness to confront uncomfortable truths. But for anyone caught in the cycle of addiction—whether it’s gaming, social media, or anything else—the path to freedom starts with one simple realization: it’s okay to press pause.


 

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Understanding Anxiety in Children and Teenagers

Anxiety is one of the most common mental health challenges faced by children and teenagers today. It can manifest in various ways, from school-related stress to social anxiety, and understanding it is crucial for parents, educators, and peers. Let’s dive into what anxiety looks like in young people, how it affects their lives, and what can be done to support them.


The Landscape of Anxiety in Youth


Anxiety disorders can include generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, panic disorder, and specific phobias. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, approximately 31.9% of adolescents aged 13 to 18 experience an anxiety disorder. This means that nearly one in three teenagers may face significant anxiety at some point in their lives.


Meet Lily, a 15-year-old high school student. While she appears cheerful and engaged at school, Lily experiences intense anxiety during exams. She worries about failing, which leads to sleepless nights and a racing heart. Despite her hard work, the fear of disappointing her parents and herself looms large, impacting her performance and self-esteem.


Signs and Symptoms


Identifying anxiety in children and teenagers can be challenging, as they may not articulate their feelings well. Here are some common signs:


- Physical Symptoms: Complaints of headaches, stomachaches, or fatigue may arise. For instance, Jake, a 12-year-old, often feels nauseous before school, which his parents initially attributed to a stomach bug but later realized was tied to his anxiety about social interactions.


- Behavioral Changes: Increased irritability, withdrawal from activities, or changes in appetite can indicate anxiety. Emily, a 13-year-old, used to love playing soccer, but after developing anxiety about being judged by her teammates, she stopped attending practices.


- Academic Struggles: Anxiety can lead to difficulties in concentration and performance. Alex, a 16-year-old, once excelled in math, but his anxiety over upcoming tests has caused him to avoid studying, leading to declining grades.


The Impact of Anxiety on Daily Life


Anxiety can significantly affect a young person’s quality of life. It can hinder their social interactions, academic performance, and overall well-being. As seen in Lily, Jake, Emily, and Alex, anxiety often creates a cycle of avoidance, further reinforcing their fears and limiting their experiences.


For example, when Lily avoids studying, she feels guilty and anxious, believing she’ll fail. This leads her to procrastinate further, creating a vicious cycle. Similarly, Emily’s withdrawal from soccer not only reduces her physical activity but also cuts her off from friends, increasing her feelings of loneliness.


Strategies for Support


Supporting children and teenagers with anxiety involves a combination of understanding, communication, and practical strategies:


1. Open Communication: Encourage open dialogues about feelings. Parents and teachers should create safe spaces where young people feel comfortable expressing their worries without judgment.


For example, Lily’s parents initiated weekly family check-ins where everyone shares their highs and lows. This simple practice has helped her articulate her anxiety surrounding school.


2. Teach Coping Strategies: Introduce relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, or yoga. These can empower young people to manage anxiety in real-time.


For example, Jake learned a simple breathing technique that he uses before school, which has helped him feel calmer and more prepared for the day.


3. Encourage Gradual Exposure: Help children and teenagers face their fears in manageable steps. Gradual exposure can help reduce avoidance behaviors.


For example, Emily’s parents encouraged her to attend soccer practice for just 15 minutes at first. Over time, she became more comfortable and eventually rejoined the team.


4. Professional Help: If anxiety significantly impacts daily functioning, seeking help from a mental health professional can be beneficial. Therapies like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) have been proven effective in treating anxiety in youth.


For example, after noticing a decline in Alex’s grades and mood, his parents sought the help of a therapist who specialized in adolescent anxiety, providing him with tools to manage his symptoms.


Conclusion: Building Resilience


While anxiety can be a daunting challenge for children and teenagers, it is important to remember that with the right support and resources, they can learn to navigate their feelings and build resilience. By fostering an understanding environment, equipping them with coping strategies, and encouraging professional help when necessary, we can empower young people to face their anxieties head-on.


In a world that often feels overwhelming, the goal is to help our youth not just survive but thrive, transforming their struggles into strengths as they embark on their journeys to adulthood. Let’s work together to ensure that every child and teenager has the tools they need to flourish, anxiety and all.


 

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In Judith Guest’s poignant novel Ordinary People, we meet Conrad Jarrett, a teenager grappling with profound grief and the heavy weight of expectations. His journey is one that resonates deeply with many who face mental health challenges, making his character a compelling lens through which we can explore themes of loss, family dynamics, and the path toward healing.

In Judith Guest’s poignant novel Ordinary People, we meet Conrad Jarrett, a teenager grappling with profound grief and the heavy weight of expectations. His journey is one that resonates deeply with many who face mental health challenges, making his character a compelling lens through which we can explore themes of loss, family dynamics, and the path toward healing.


The Weight of Loss


Conrad's life is forever altered by the tragic death of his older brother, Buck, in a boating accident. This event not only shatters his family but also leaves Conrad feeling lost in a sea of guilt and depression. He struggles to navigate a world that seems to expect him to simply move on, while he’s stuck in the throes of his grief.


This experience is a familiar one for many individuals dealing with loss. The societal pressure to “get over it” often dismisses the depth of one’s emotions. For Conrad, the death of Buck is not just a personal loss; it symbolizes the collapse of his family’s structure and the expectations placed upon him.


The Burden of Expectations


Conrad’s journey is complicated by the expectations of his parents, particularly his mother, Beth, who struggles to cope with her grief in her own way. Beth's insistence on maintaining a facade of normalcy creates an emotional chasm between her and Conrad. He feels alienated, grappling with feelings of inadequacy and the fear of disappointing those he loves.


This tension illustrates a crucial aspect of mental health: the impact of familial dynamics on an individual’s well-being. Families often have unspoken rules and expectations that can exacerbate a person’s mental health struggles. Conrad’s story emphasizes the importance of open communication and understanding within family units.


Seeking Help


Conrad's path to healing begins when he seeks therapy, an act that symbolizes strength rather than weakness. His therapist, Dr. Berger, provides a safe space for him to express his feelings, confront his guilt, and explore the nuances of his identity beyond his trauma. This therapeutic relationship becomes a pivotal part of Conrad's healing process.


The portrayal of therapy in Ordinary People sheds light on the stigma surrounding mental health treatment. Many individuals hesitate to seek help due to fear of judgment or misunderstanding. Conrad’s journey highlights that reaching out for support is a courageous step toward recovery.


The Road to Acceptance


As Conrad navigates the challenges of his mental health, he learns to embrace his emotions rather than suppress them. His experiences serve as a reminder that healing is not linear; it involves setbacks and breakthroughs. By the end of the novel, Conrad begins to redefine his relationship with his family and himself, moving toward a place of acceptance.


This transformation underscores the idea that mental health is an ongoing journey. For many, it involves acknowledging one’s feelings, seeking support, and allowing oneself the grace to heal at their own pace.


Conclusion: The Power of Authenticity


Conrad Jarrett’s story in Ordinary People resonates with anyone who has ever felt the weight of grief, expectation, or isolation. His character embodies the struggles faced by many teenagers today—struggles that are often compounded by the pressure to appear “normal.”


Through Conrad's journey, readers are reminded of the importance of authenticity, the necessity of seeking help, and the power of open communication within families. In a world that often glorifies perfection, Ordinary People serves as a testament to the beauty and strength found in vulnerability and resilience.


By embracing our quirks and acknowledging our struggles, we can all move toward a healthier, more fulfilling existence. Conrad's journey invites us to reflect on our own experiences and to approach mental health with compassion—both for ourselves and others.


 

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