Holiday Stress | Moody Melon Magazine

Skipping Thanksgiving? Here's Why Celebrating Small Wins Can Be Your True Path to Bliss

Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
Nov 27, 2024

Celebrating small wins is a powerful way to build momentum and boost your mental health, reminding yourself that every step forward counts. Whether it’s completing a task, setting a boundary, or simply getting through a tough day, acknowledging these victories can help you stay focused and motivated.

Skipping Thanksgiving? Here's Why Celebrating Small Wins Can Be Your True Path to Bliss

The holiday season is supposed to be a time of joy, but for many, it can feel like a pressure cooker of stress, social anxiety, and emotional exhaustion. Thanksgiving, in particular, is synonymous with large gatherings, grand meals, and the expectation to feel “thankful”—but for some, these traditions can feel anything but joyous. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by the obligations of the holiday or the pressure to meet certain social standards, you’re not alone.

But here’s the good news: skipping Thanksgiving doesn’t mean missing out on joy. In fact, it could be the most liberating choice you make. Instead of conforming to the hustle and bustle, why not focus on what truly matters: celebrating yourself. By shifting your focus away from the chaotic holiday narrative and honing in on your own small wins, you can create a sense of peace, joy, and accomplishment—without the holiday stress.

The Overwhelm of Traditional Thanksgiving: A Day of Expectation

For some, Thanksgiving brings with it the stress of family dynamics, long travel times, and the pressure of “perfecting” the day. If you’re struggling with anxiety, depression, or feeling disconnected from family, the idea of a massive dinner or social obligation can feel suffocating. The very notion of feeling "grateful" can seem hollow when you're overwhelmed, burnt out, or emotionally drained. It's easy to start thinking that Thanksgiving isn’t a time for celebration, but for many, it becomes just another day filled with expectations.

But what if you didn’t have to take part in the traditional holiday celebration? What if you could make Thanksgiving your own and focus on celebrating your personal growth and accomplishments instead? For those of us who struggle with social anxiety, family conflict, or simply the weight of tradition, opting out can be a powerful act of self-care. It’s a way to reclaim the space you need for peace and reflection, all while honoring the quiet victories in your life.

Celebrating Small Wins: A New Kind of Gratitude

The beauty of choosing to skip Thanksgiving is that it allows you to embrace a new form of celebration. Instead of focusing on the larger-than-life moments, you can focus on the small, often overlooked achievements that have shaped your year. These small wins might not have the same grandeur as a holiday feast, but they are just as, if not more, important for your mental health and well-being.

1. The Win of Getting Through a Tough Week

Maybe your biggest achievement this year hasn’t been a promotion or a grand accomplishment, but simply surviving a difficult week. Maybe you juggled work stress, family obligations, and your own mental health challenges—and you made it through. That’s worth celebrating! The act of simply being when life feels overwhelming is a victory in itself. Take time to honor your resilience.

Example: If you’ve recently managed a stressful work deadline or dealt with a personal health struggle and still showed up for yourself—no matter how tired or emotionally drained you felt—that’s a win. Pour yourself a cup of your favorite tea, take a long bath, and reflect on how far you’ve come.

2. The Win of Taking a Mental Health Day

Sometimes, the best thing you can do for your mental health is to take a break—and that’s not always easy. If you’ve taken a mental health day this year, congratulations! Recognizing the need for rest and emotional recovery is a massive step toward self-awareness and self-love.

Example: Maybe this year you took a day off work to rest after a stressful period, or perhaps you allowed yourself a day to relax with no expectations. These seemingly simple actions help you restore your energy, recharge your emotional batteries, and remind yourself that you matter.

3. The Win of Saying "No"

Setting boundaries is a huge win—yet it’s often underrated. If you’ve said "no" to a commitment or request that didn’t serve you this year, you’ve already accomplished something significant. Saying no isn’t always easy, especially when there are external pressures. But doing so in favor of your own needs and well-being is a reflection of your personal growth.

Example: Perhaps you said no to attending a family gathering that would have drained you emotionally, or maybe you didn’t take on extra work when you were already overloaded. These are not small actions—they’re powerful forms of self-care.

4. The Win of Practicing Self-Compassion

In a world where perfection is often glorified, showing yourself compassion is a quiet but powerful victory. If you’ve worked on silencing your inner critic or given yourself permission to not be perfect, you’ve made tremendous progress.

Example: Maybe you’ve learned to forgive yourself for past mistakes or chosen to celebrate your efforts, not just the results. Perhaps you’ve been kinder to yourself on days when everything felt like too much. These moments of self-compassion pave the way for healthier mental habits in the long run.

5. The Win of Finding Joy in the Simple Things

In a world that’s constantly moving, it can be easy to overlook the small, everyday joys. Finding delight in simple pleasures—whether it’s watching a sunset, reading a book, or taking a walk—can provide a deep sense of fulfillment. Celebrating these small moments can bring you a profound sense of gratitude without the need for grandiose celebrations.

Example: Maybe this year, you found joy in something simple: the feel of soft rain on your face, a delicious cup of coffee in the morning, or the quiet satisfaction of a well-tended garden. These small moments are the quiet, sustainable sources of joy that contribute to your mental well-being.

The Bliss of Your Own Celebration

By focusing on your personal victories, you take back the narrative of what it means to "celebrate." Instead of feeling obligated to participate in large social gatherings that cause anxiety, you can create a meaningful experience for yourself. Skipping Thanksgiving can give you the space to acknowledge how far you’ve come, the challenges you’ve faced, and the progress you’ve made. And perhaps most importantly, it allows you to celebrate your own journey on your own terms.

Final Thoughts: Embrace the Power of Small Wins

This Thanksgiving, consider turning away from traditional celebrations and focusing on what really matters: celebrating you. Whether it’s taking the day to reflect, indulging in self-care, or simply acknowledging your wins, choosing to focus on your growth can provide you with a deep sense of fulfillment and peace. After all, true gratitude begins with appreciating yourself—and the quiet victories that shape who you are.

So, this year, forget the turkey and the holiday bustle. Instead, focus on the small but mighty wins you’ve made—and take the time to celebrate them. Because you deserve it.

Thanksgiving Anxiety: Creative Ways to Find Peace Amid the Feast

Julie Barris | Crisis Counselor | Therapist-in-Training
Nov 23, 2024

Thanksgiving anxiety can arise from the pressure to meet family expectations, create the perfect meal, or navigate tricky social dynamics. But with some creative coping strategies and a mindset shift, it’s possible to enjoy the holiday without the stress.

Thanksgiving Anxiety: Creative Ways to Find Peace Amid the Feast

For many, Thanksgiving is a time of gratitude, togetherness, and indulgence—a much-anticipated holiday spent with family, friends, and loved ones. But for some, it can also be a source of anxiety. Whether it’s the pressure to create the perfect meal, the expectations around family dynamics, or the emotional weight of the season, Thanksgiving can bring out stress and worries that feel just as heavy as the turkey.

If you’re someone who feels a twinge of anxiety at the thought of Thanksgiving—whether it’s about navigating social situations, managing expectations, or simply handling the sheer volume of tasks—know you’re not alone. But the good news is that there are creative and effective ways to cope with Thanksgiving anxiety and still enjoy the holiday.

1. Set Realistic Expectations—And Communicate Them!

One of the biggest sources of Thanksgiving anxiety is the pressure to meet everyone’s expectations. Whether it’s preparing a flawless meal, hosting a perfect gathering, or living up to your family’s traditions, the weight of expectations can feel overwhelming. This year, take a step back and evaluate what you can realistically handle. It’s okay to scale down the guest list, opt for a potluck-style meal, or simplify your usual routines.

If you’re feeling stressed about family dynamics or uncertain expectations, it’s okay to communicate openly. Be transparent with your loved ones about what you can manage, and ask for help where needed. A little honesty can go a long way in relieving unnecessary stress.

2. Practice Mindful Gratitude—Even When It Feels Hard

The very concept of Thanksgiving is built around gratitude. But for some, focusing on gratitude can feel like another chore—especially when anxiety is already clouding your mind. If you find yourself struggling to tap into that thankful mindset, try a more mindful approach. Instead of forcing yourself to feel grateful for everything, focus on one small thing at a time.

You can do this by starting a gratitude jar. Each time something good happens, no matter how small, write it down on a slip of paper and put it in the jar. On Thanksgiving day, take a moment to read them aloud. This simple act of reflection can remind you that even in moments of anxiety, there are still things worth appreciating.

3. Incorporate a "Pre-Thanksgiving Chill Out" Routine

One of the best ways to prepare for the holiday and alleviate stress is to carve out some “you” time before the big day. A few hours of solitude can do wonders for your mental well-being. Whether it’s a quiet morning walk, a session of yoga, or just curling up with a good book or podcast, create a calming pre-Thanksgiving ritual to center yourself.

If you're already feeling anxiety creeping in as the holiday approaches, try building a daily routine that helps you decompress. A few minutes of deep breathing exercises, meditation, or journaling can ground you in the present and calm your mind.

4. Get Creative with Your Holiday Plans

The idea of Thanksgiving may come with the expectation of a large, traditional gathering, but what if you flipped the script and made it your own? You don’t have to host a lavish dinner with a dozen people to make the day special. In fact, a change in routine might be just what you need to reduce anxiety and create a new, more enjoyable tradition.

Consider alternatives like a “Friendsgiving,” a low-key virtual dinner with distant family members, or even a solo Thanksgiving retreat. If you enjoy creative outlets, why not use the holiday to bake something new, write a personal thank-you letter to yourself, or make a gratitude art project? By adding your unique touch to the day, you can reduce the pressure and find joy in a less conventional celebration.

5. Lean Into the Power of Laughter and Humor

Laughter can be a great antidote to anxiety. It helps reduce stress hormones, boosts endorphins, and creates a sense of connection. If your anxiety is coming from worries about family dynamics or the potential for awkward moments, consider embracing the humor in the situation. After all, Thanksgiving is full of potential for quirky conversations and funny moments, whether it’s the family member who always burns the pie or the holiday mishaps that everyone secretly looks forward to.

If you’re feeling nervous, try to set the tone with lightheartedness. Watch a funny movie the night before, share some silly jokes, or even print out a Thanksgiving-themed trivia game. When you add humor into the mix, it helps shift the focus from tension to connection.

6. Practice the 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique

If your anxiety spikes during Thanksgiving, try the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique to bring your mind back to the present moment. It’s a simple and effective way to manage anxious feelings, especially if you start to feel overwhelmed during family gatherings or when managing holiday tasks.

Here’s how it works:

5: Acknowledge 5 things you can see around you.
4: Notice 4 things you can touch.
3: Listen for 3 things you can hear.
2: Identify 2 things you can smell.
1: Recognize 1 thing you can taste or imagine tasting.

This technique helps anchor you in the present moment, which can quiet anxiety and reframe your thoughts away from worry.

7. Give Yourself Permission to Say "No"

Many people with Thanksgiving anxiety feel the pressure to be everything to everyone. Whether it's attending multiple events, hosting extra guests, or volunteering for extra tasks, the idea of saying “no” can feel impossible. But you are allowed to protect your time and energy.

If your plate is full (literally and figuratively), it’s okay to say no to invitations or to opt out of activities that will add unnecessary stress. Set boundaries that prioritize your mental health, and don’t feel guilty about putting yourself first. Taking care of yourself will make it possible to show up more fully for the people you love.

8. Create a "Stress-Free Zone"

If family dynamics or holiday chaos tend to make you anxious, designate a “stress-free zone” where you can retreat when things feel overwhelming. It could be a cozy corner of the house, a nearby park, or even a quiet room with calming music or a favorite book. Giving yourself permission to step away and recharge can help you manage stress and reset when needed.

Having a space to retreat to will remind you that you have control over your experience, and that it’s okay to take breaks throughout the day.

Final Thoughts

Thanksgiving may never be completely stress-free, but with the right mindset and a few creative coping strategies, it’s possible to make it a more peaceful, enjoyable experience. Remember, Thanksgiving isn’t about perfection—it’s about presence. By embracing flexibility, setting realistic expectations, and finding moments of peace, you can create a holiday that feels manageable, meaningful, and even fun.

After all, the greatest gift you can give yourself this Thanksgiving is the freedom to relax and enjoy the season, anxiety-free. 🍁✨

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